Marion Craig Dagrossa

Marion Craig DaGrossa, 82, of Ithaca, died Saturday October 19th 2019, with her children by her side.

Marion was born on September 18th 1937, in Atlantic City to Carman John and Emma Agnes Craig DaGrossa. Marion grew up in Linwood NJ, a lover of the shore and ocean and all of its diversity of life.

Marion graduated from High School in Pleasantville NJ in 1955, with her B.A. from Russell Sage College in 1969, and her M.S. from Elmira College in 1982.

Marion was preceded in death by her parents and brother Donald DaGrossa. She is survived by her children, grandchildren, extended family, and leaves behind a tight knit group of friends the likes of which only the YaYa sisterhood could mimic.

This tribe of loved ones includes: David Rosenbaum, Jane Kennedy, Fiona Kennedy of Ithaca NY. Forest Kennedy of Austin TX; Allyn Rosenbaum, Patrice Jennings, Zach Rosenbaum, Parker Jennings of Ithaca NY; Mara Murray, Keith Murray, Kayla,  Evan, Eden and Mya Murray of Newport Coast CA; Former husband Dick Rosenbaum and wife Jane Dieckmann of Ithaca NY, and her children Katherine and Judith Dieckmann of New York City; Former wife Nancy Gabriel, and her children Elisabeth Lindsay of Ithaca NY and Max Gaenslen of Daly City CA. Sister in Law Penny DaGrossa, and her daughters and their families.

In the late 1960’s  Marion volunteered with a local program teaching the children of migrant workers who were in our region during the picking season. In the early 70’s  she became an active member of the Ithaca adoptive families network. These experiences stimulated both her social activism and her desire to make a career of teaching, which became her life’s work.

Marion began work in the Ithaca City School District in the mid 70’s serving as “Marion the Librarian” for the visionary East Hill Elementary School, whose reunion she was pleased to attend in September 2019.

Marion’s career spanned decades as well as grades and roles. During a sabbatical in Wood’s Hole Massachusetts she discovered the Children’s School of Science, where she taught for many summers. Teaching there deepened her love of science and nature as well as beginning her adventures as a dedicated birder. Marion taught mainly fifth grade at Belle Sherman Elementary, Enfield Elementary, Cayuga Heights School, and for many years at Central Elementary, and later Beverly J. Martin Elementary, from which she retired. Even after officially retiring she came back when requested to take over a suddenly teacherless classroom at Caroline Elementary. As her family members know well you couldn’t walk across the Ithaca Commons with Marion without being stopped by a former student of hers calling out “Ms. DaGrossa!” excitement evident in their voice at seeing her once again.  Marion’s innovative style of teaching, involving going above and beyond the basics to meet the needs of her students however she could, touched many lives in our community. The stories she told about students showed us how much she really saw them as they were, and strove to meet them there.

Marion played an active role in every community of which she was a part. Not one to sit back and watch, she got involved and worked for what she believed in.

When a close friend of hers benefitted from the support of the Cancer Resource Center she began participating in their annual fundraising walk-a thon.  When someone dear to her received essential support from Ithaca Rape Crisis she became an annual donor. Marion served on the Ithaca Community Police Board from 2013- 2018 a role she was honored to fill. Marion was an active member of the Ithaca Friends Meeting for many years, and was instrumental in the development of the Third Street Meeting House. For many years Marion tutored teenagers incarcerated at the MacCormick Secure Center, worked with OAR to support local jail inmates and their families., and through the Quakers promoted education within the NYS prison system.

Marion’s advocacy for African Americans began early in her life as she observed racial disparities and injustice growing up in South Jersey.

When people close to her benefitted from the support of the Cancer Resource Center, and Ithaca Rape Crisis she made those organizations beneficiaries of her work.  Marion served on the Ithaca Community Police Board from 2013- 2018 a role she was honored to fill. For many years Marion was an active member of the Ithaca Friends Meeting and was instrumental in the development of the Third Street Meeting House. Marion tutored teens incarcerated at the MacCormick Secure Center, worked with OAR to support local jail inmates and their families, and through the Quakers promoted education within the NYS prison system.

Marion was tireless in her advocacy for people in the African American community, as a teacher, a mother, and a community member, she was a committed anti-racist.  As part of the Friends Meeting she supported the creation of the local Friends Center for Racial Justice.

For pleasure Marion played recorder with the Seneca Street Recorder ensemble and for many years could be heard playing with them at their annual appearance at Porchfest and at the holiday concert at the Roberson Museum in Binghamton.

Upon retirement Marion’s family sent her and Nancy to Costa Rica where they enjoyed the rainforest, the ocean, the tide pools, the volcano, and delighted in the incredible diversity of flora and fauna. This began a much loved era of frequent travel for Marion and Nancy. Together they visited many wonderful locations; Sanibel Island Florida, finding shells and birds, In France they visited museums and shops and soaked up the city from a little apartment.  They went to Italy, both Florence and Venice. On one trip they took the Orient Express, marveling through the night at the moonlit vistas of the Alps. A memorable and then shared experience was visiting the Murano glassworks, from which she returned with gorgeous glass gifts for family members.

With grandchildren at Elizabeth Ann Clune Montessori Schooland and Caroline Elementary she spent time each week supporting their classrooms, continuing to use her expertise in education years after her retirement.  She treasured being part of their schools, seamlessly blending into this part of her grandchildren’s lives, and they loved having her know their teachers and peers.

Marion delighted in the activities and accomplishments of her grandchildren, whether here in Ithaca or far away.  “Grandy” as she was known to the kids, created intricate cards for every occasion, sending grandchildren custom cards for: halloween, birthdays, Valentine’s Day, Christmas,first days of school, first lost teeth, graduations; any event that required recognition.   Many traditions grew around particular events and holidays, a visit to Grandy immediately after a haircut, annual birthday shopping trips for a budding fashionista. Her convenient downtown location and her role as family matriarch made her house the center for family activities.  The annual viewing of the duck races, the Ithaca Festival parade and pre parade pizza party, Halloween preparations in her living room, children and adults giggling and dressing while the flying bat circled endlessly on the porch. Grandchildren dropped by Grandy’s house after school, either walking there, or driven by parents eager for a break.  Grandy fed them, nurtured them, solicited their help with her electronics, and grew them up with her love and care. Grandy played a role as a grandparent that few families today are privileged to experience. She was actively involved in the lives of her children, their partners, and grandchildren, and she was quick to support any in need in a crisis, big or small.  Sick grandchildren spent many days on Grandy’s couch so parents could work, kids who needed to be driven places got driven by Grandy, often with treats enroute. Grandy came to parent teacher conferences as requested to share her experience, Grandy did homework when parents were pulling their hair out. Grandy indulged, supported, and loved those in her family robustly.

With some of her grandchildren across the continent Marion made frequent trips to California.  Blending into the lives of her west coast family she took grandkids to school, often enjoying “flag deck”.  She kept up her standard activities, reading and doing homework with all the grandchildren who would have her. She loved going out for a “girls lunch” and shopping with Joan, the grandkids California grandma.  She enjoyed the Mexican food, often homemade, and delighted in eating and drinking margaritas with the family. She enjoyed the Pacific Ocean as much as the Atlantic. Many wonderful days were spent in tidepools, watching birds, and  splashing in pools and waves.

For many summers family reunions took place in Ocean City NJ, where Marion shared her love of the beach, ocean, sea creatures, and avian life with all of her grandchildren as they gathered there. Days were spent jumping waves, building sandcastles, identifying shells, delighting in boardwalk treats, racing surreys down the boardwalk with pedalers of all size and strength working together. Bird watching trips were plentiful and “skimmers skimming” were seen and enjoyed.  Evenings were spent over family dinners, or on the boardwalk, watching Mummers parade, indulging in treats, reveling in the amusement park, screaming on the terrifying log flume, and surviving the annual ride on the “Giant Wheel” which Marion endured with white knuckles. Informal family photos were taken, frequently on “Grandy’s Bench” near the favorite boardwalk entrance.

For Marion’s 80th birthday her family surprised her with the gift of her own  “Grandy’s Bench” in Stewart Park along the waterfront trail. A grand weekend celebration with all of the california cousins arriving took place.  Marion basked in the love and hub-bub generated by the wealth of family at her celebration.

For Marion’s 80th birthday her family surprised her with the gift of her own  “Grandy’s Bench” in Stewart Park along the waterfront trail. A weekend celebration with all of the California cousins arriving took place.  Marion basked in the love and hub-bub and the wealth of family at her celebration.

To stay in touch with her distant, as well as tween and teen grandchildren, Grandy kept abreast of the latest technology.  Switching her paper calendar to the electronic one on her phone, managing her Instagram account (with grandkid support), and learning the intricacies of her treasured apple watch, gave her both pride and frustration.  But it kept her in the daily loop of photos from the people she loved so dearly. Texting her grandkids messages of encouragement- or tech support S.O.S. calls, Marion never stopped adapting and growing.

As Marion carefully dispersed her precious belongings toward the end of her life many people and places benefitted, as clothing was donated to those in need, books on racial diversity, indigenous culture, African folk tales, made their way to libraries, incredible shell collections delighted her grandchildren. Marion thought about what had been useful and important to her and shared those resources with her community.

Marion’s contributions; to those close to her, and to those with whom she crossed or shared paths, were huge. She was a person and force to be noticed.  She worked to make the world a place that supported everyone. She made a difference. Her daily presence is already greatly missed.

Many thanks to those who shared in caregiving to Marion. To the wonderful people from her time with Hospicare, and Bridges. To Lori, Val and Crystal.  To Jacque who spent many days as her companion. To Elisabeth Lindsay, who helped her manage her medical appointments and challenges with agency and dignity.

Please join us in remembering Marion at the First Unitarian Society of Ithaca on Saturday December 7th at 11:00 am.

In lieu of flowers, donations may be made to the Cancer Resource Center, and the Advocacy Center.

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