Elizabeth Kasanin Hand

Elizabeth K. Hand of Ithaca, New York 1935 – 2020

On Saturday, August 8, 2020, Elizabeth (“Betsy”) Hand, beloved wife, mother, and grandmother, died at Strong Memorial Hospital in Rochester, New York due to an aortic aneurysm.

Elizabeth Merrill Kasanin was born on October 31, 1935 in Providence, Rhode Island. She moved with her family to San Francisco in 1939, and from then on considered herself a true Californian. She graduated from The University of California at Berkeley in 1956, where she majored in Social Welfare. During her senior year she became engaged to Louis Neff Hand; he knew he wanted to marry her the very first time he heard her voice.

Betsy and Lou were married in December 1956, in the Stanford Memorial Church. Together, they raised four children who were born between 1958 and 1974; she loved raising babies and felt that having them so far apart allowed her to give each her full attention. After her last child was born she started work as a Library Assistant at Cornell Law Library between 1977 and 2011 – over 30 years.

Betsy was known for her quick wit and her dark and self-deprecating sense of humor, as well as her wisdom and compassion. She always listened closely, providing insight and character analysis to those who sought her advice. She was able to assess a situation as no one else could – often providing a perspective that had been missed – yet still offering definitive and practical advice. Her apparent innocence made her sharp zingers all the more surprising.

Betsy appreciated aesthetic beauty and good entertainment, with an eye for detail and craft; she loved Japanese prints, her paperweight collection, drives in the country, sewing, embroidery, mystery novels, and comedic and classic movies. She found new purpose and friends at her job at the Law Library, where she cataloged foreign language books, rare books, and serials. Through some expert sleuthing in 1985, Betsy discovered one of only twenty copies of a contemporary account of the Borden murders in the stacks of the Law Library; Lizzie Borden had allegedly destroyed the entire edition. The friends Betsy made over the course of her lifetime continued to be important to her as time passed.

In recent days, Betsy expressed gratitude for having lived her dream of being a mom. She asked, “How many people get to live the life they wanted?” Over almost 64 years of marriage, she went to great lengths to provide stability and support. She was determined to ensure that her children would always have a safe home in Ithaca. She emphasized the importance of family, marking every birthday and holiday with carefully selected cards. Holidays that are inherently joyful were her favorite: Valentine’s Day, Easter, and Halloween.

From Betsy, we, her children, learned the values of loyalty and constancy. She shared with us her sense of humor—a gift that continues to bring us together and to help us withstand life’s trials. On Thursday, as her strength started to wane, the doctor reminded her, “Now remember, your only job is to not worry.” Hearing this, she rallied unexpectedly. “Bummer,” she said, to the surprise and delight of her audience, a room full of doctors, nurses, residents, social workers, and family. She had always been a worrier, and prided herself on that. This force of mind was quintessential Betsy or “Mom”: she made us laugh at unexpected times. Her mind, her heart, and her fighting spirit are missed.

Betsy is survived by her husband, Louis, of Ithaca, NY; her three daughters, Brooke Gifford (of Saratoga Springs, NY), Pattie Hand (of New York, NY), and Sonya Stover (of Hanover, NH); as well as five grandchildren, and many cousins, in-laws, and nephews. She is predeceased by her son, Jonathan Hand. A private burial service will be held on Saturday, August 15. A separate memorial service will be held at a future date when large gatherings are considered safe again. Cards and flowers may be sent to the Hand family at 5210 Savage Farm Dr., Ithaca NY 14850. Donations can be made to the Tompkins County Public Library Foundation, https://www.tcplfoundation.org/ , so that others can enjoy books as much as Betsy did.

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